For Christmas my daughters gave me a gift called “Storyworth.” Each week for a year it asks you to write the answer to an email question about your life, and at the end of the year they print a hard cover book of all your answers. This was the question for this week, and I thought it was one we all might want to answer. What would your answer be?
What do you consider one of your greatest achievements in life?
I think one of my greatest achievements has been having resilience – having the strength to keep my faith, maintain a positive attitude, and find new purpose through some really difficult times of my life. It was not always easy and sometimes took a long time, but somehow, through my belief in God’s love, my own inner strength, and the love of many dear friends and family, I was able to rise above the pain, keep on going, and even find joy in my life again after some truly heartrending situations. The blessing that has come out of these struggles is that I have been able, through my story, to help many hurting people all over the world find hope and new purpose in their own lives.
At age five I was bitten in the head by my uncle’s dog, it got infected, and they didn’t think I would live. Of course I did live, but I ended up with huge hunks of scar tissue all over my head, literally a freak. As a result, I had to have plastic surgery the next two summers at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN. (Interestingly, my parents allowed no pictures to be taken of me during that time, so I have never seen how awful I looked.) As horrific as this sounds, unlike my parents, I have not a single bad memory of this whole experience because of all the little kind, caring things people did for me all along the way. Many times I have been able to share this story with my audiences to illustrate the differences we can each make, with a little kindness, in people’s lives every day.
When I was only twenty-seven years old, in one year my Dad died suddenly of a heart attack at age 62, our one year old St. Bernard puppy died unexpectedly, and most devastating of all, our second little boy, Gavin Ward Glanz, died a day after birth, even though I had had a perfectly normal pregnancy. He was buried on Christmas Eve which of course is the celebration of the birth of a baby. No one can know the pain of losing a child of any age until it happens to you.
That year was the hardest of my whole life! It took me almost five years to be nearly whole again…….yet even in the midst of this terrible struggle, I still had the faith and the inner strength to simply learn to live just five minutes at a time….. until I could get through an hour and finally a whole day. And the greatest blessing was that I still had a purpose to live for – our two year old son, Garrett Wayne Glanz, and a hurting husband who both needed me.
I was hurting so deeply that I knew in my heart that nothing or no one could ever hurt me that much again, so I made the decision that I would alway be completely myself. That gift of authenticity has been one of the greatest blessings in my life. When I sometimes share this story with my audiences, it provides a real life lesson of LEARNING to live one day at a time, LEARNING to be vulnerable and real, and LEARNING that every day we wake up is a gift.
Finally, when my dear husband, Charlie, my soulmate and the love of my life, died of cancer when I was just 56, I had another crisis to face. All of a sudden I was alone! I did not fit in our big house in the suburbs of Chicago anymore, my children all lived across the country on the West coast, and I had to find my own way forward. I eventually decided to sell our longtime family home and move to the beach in Florida, a lifelong dream of mine to live by the water. However, it was a hard move, and I almost died of loneliness the first year because I knew no one. But thankfully, I had my work – my purpose – and with some reaching out like starting a book group and joining a church, I eventually made a place for myself in this new community.
As I write this, I am at another crossroads – I think it is about time for me to retire, so I have some new difficult decisions to make. Should I stay here on the beach, should I move closer to my children in Portland and Seattle, should I stay working just parttime, and most importantly, what will my new purpose be? Life is full of challenges but also many joys, and I know I will find my path forward as always, trusting in my own strength, friends and family, and most of all, the love and guidance of the Lord.
Charles Dickens in “Great Expectations” says, “Life is made up of many partings welded together.” I would add that life is also made up of many new beginnings if we adjust our attitude, dig deep down inside for our inner strength, and trust that God has a plan for our lives.
For more information about Barbara’s work, go to http://www.barbaraglanz.com
