HAPPINESS IS…..??????

In their new book, “Who Are You and What Do You Want – A Journey for the Best of your Life,” Mick Ukleja , Ph. D, and Robert Lorber, Ph. D. share some interesting statistics about happiness from a book by Silverstein and Fiske which reveal that we Americans are, for the most part, an “overwhelmed, isolated, lonely, worried, and unhappy lot.” These were the responses received :

Never have enough time 54.8%
Don’t get enough sleep 53.8%
Don’t spend enough time with friends 51.5%
Worry about my health 40.1%
Working harder than ever 38.0%
Feel a great deal of stress in my life 36.6%
Don’t feel appreciated for all that I do 36.5%
Am happy with my appearance 30.5%
Am happy in my romantic relationships 17.8%

Only 39% agreed with the statement, “I have the right balance in my life;” only 37% with “I feel like a part of my community;” and only 33% (one person in three) with “I have a lot of close friends.”

In “The Progress Paradox, Gregg Easterbrook writes, “The disabled and chronically ill report a slightly higher sense of well-being than the population at large; they have a higher appreciation for the value of their own lives.”

What is thought-provoking for me about these studies is that we as Americans have the highest standard of living in the world, the most access to all kinds of goods and services, and a longer life span than ever before. Yet look how many people are unhappy with their lives!

What really caught my attention was the statement about the disabled and chronically ill being bappier than the rest of the population, and it triggered for me this question:

MUST WE HAVE A LOSS OF SOME KIND IN OUR LIVES IN ORDER TO APPRECIATE HOW GOOD WE REALLY HAVE IT?

Here are Owen and Simon Gawlik, my precious new little grandchildren. They and Gavin and Kinsey are MY happiness! 😉

If you want to make your workplace happier, read “CARE Packages for the Workplace — Dozens of Little Things You Can Do to Regenerate Spirit at Work” by Barbara Glanz, www.barbaraglanz.com/products/books.php3.

Weekly Question and Answer

Click on the link to watch Barbara answer this question!

How do I help create loyal customers?

To find out more about customer loyalty, read CARE Packages for your Customers by Barbara Glanz, available at www.barbaraglanz.com/products/books.php3.

LIFE TRANSITIONS AND CHANGE

I have been thinking a lot about Change and life transitions lately. My youngest daughter, Erin, just graduated last week from the Art Institute of Portland with her second degree, a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Apparel Design. It was a mountaintop moment for us all as she has struggled for years to find her special niche, and at last she has found the best way to use her gifts.

Not only was she one of just two students who graduated “With Highest Honor,” but also her design collection, called “Focus Volume,” was selected to be the finale of the huge Fashion Show at the Portland Art Museum last Sunday evening, their designs and the actual creation of them being the culmination of the years of study by all the graduates. She got an amazing amount of press for her collection, and she was truly the “star” of the show!

However, as the commencement speaker pointed out, that day she was on the top of the hill, having achieved a goal she had worked for for years in the most successful way possible. Yet the very next day, she would find herself at the very bottom of the hill, starting all over again to find a job.

This week Erin flew from Portland to Sarasota to stay with me on the beach for a few days of R and R after graduation, and at first, I was concerned about her lack of spirit and depression. Then, as we began talking, I realized that her experience was the perfect example of the presentation I give, called “Feeling your Way Through Change: Understanding and Managing Transitions in Life and Work.” Since this very week I am doing that presentation for the national convention of the Society for Human Resource Management, it has given me a wonderful story to share with my audience!

For all of us, once we reach a goal, just as Erin did, there is a deep experience of loss:

The loss of Security –All of a sudden, Erin is going to have to support herself. (I have given her the leeway of helping for three months, but up until now her expenses have been paid.)
The loss of Identity – In a couple of days she went from being the “fair haired darling” of the department to being an adult without a job,
The loss of Competence – At this point, after receiving all A’s in her classes. she is questioning what skills she really has, how they would fit into a real job, and there is fear about what might be expected of her and can she really handle that.
The loss of Relationships – All the friends she has made at school will be going different directions, and the teachers she is close to will no longer be focused on her.
The loss of Territory-The position of being the outstanding student in her classes that once belonged to her is now gone, as well as the sense of “belonging,” and even the security of a known schedule.
The loss of Sense of Direction – Suddenly, she has gone from striving to reach a long held goal to the scary place of not knowing where she will end up and what she will be doing.

Even though Erin’s experience is a personal life transition, all these things are exactly what happen in any kind of Change, in the workplace as well as in our personal lives. However, as I share in my presentations, we always have a CHOICE about how we regard these changes – we can accept them and move on OR we can fight them and hold onto the past.

The first step in handling Change is always determining what we have lost, and then we can understand what is happening and better enable ourselves to let go and focus on new opportunities (like Erin searching for a job). Interestingly, the Chinese symbol for “Change” is made up of two different symbols, one for “danger” and the other for “opportunity.” I know that Erin will eventually choose “opportunity,” but this thought exemplifies where she is right now:

“It’s not that people are so afraid of change or so in love with their old ways, but it’s the place in between that people fear. It’s like Linus when his blanket is in the dryer. He has nothing to hold on to!”

As Price Pritchett says, though, “Change always comes bearing gifts.” My hope and prayer for all of us is that we can focus on the GIFTS that the future holds, and realize that Change, whether forced or chosen, is what keeps us energized and fully alive. I am confident that Erin will find a job which will allow her to use her very special gifts to make a difference in this world. Even though at this moment she feels like a person on the monkey bars, having to let go in order to move forward, she is beginning to focus on her options and the persons in her life who can help her, and that is the first step for all us in finding a new beginning.

(For more information on Barbara’s presentation on Change, go to www.barbaraglanz.com/programs. And if you have any contacts in the fashion industry, you can reach Erin at eringlanz@yahoo,com 😉

Weekly Question and Answer

Click on the link to watch Barbara answer this question!

Why should I take time to recognize employees when they’re just doing their job?

To find out more about the importance of employee morale, read Handle with CARE–Motivating and Retaining Employees by Barbara Glanz available at www.barbaraglanz.com/products/books.php3.

A BIG Birthday!

I just finished my first week of being 65… I guess now I am officially “old!”

I can’t tell you how I dreaded telling anyone my new age (I think as women we can feel as if our age defines us, especially when we are in the “dating” mode!), and yet this has been one of the happiest times of my life. I highly recommend it! 😉

I have spent the past week re-connecting with dear, precious friends as well as making some new ones, and it occurred to me last night that in the mission and busyness of my work, sometimes I have failed to have a “real” life. This week I had a REAL life overflowing with love and sharing, and I am deeply grateful to feel as if my life HAS made a difference in this world.

I have been treated to lunches, brunches and dinners at places as special as the Ritz Carlton and the island of Boca Grande, but also in tiny, intimate restaurants and in the warmth of people’s precious homes. One friend planned a “Johnny the Bagger” theme, and we each had little brown bags of flowers at our places with name tags that read “Barbara the Bagger” and a thought for the day attached! Another friend invited me to a birthday party at their home on the beach and organized a special photo shoot at sunset with a visiting friend who is a photographer. (I am attaching several of the WONDERFUL pictures she took.)

My college roommate, who lives in San Antonio, Texas, wrote me the most beautiful poem (I will include it at the end) which she read to me and of course, made me cry. Being a very creative scrap booker, her other touching gift is a “Friends Book.” She asked me to send her copies of pictures of each of my special friends to include in the book, and she is adding quotations and other special meaningful decorations to each page. I can hardly wait to get it!

One of my oldest family friends who is also a widow and has lived far away from me for years and yet we have still retained a close friendship, sent me a beautiful booklet she had made for me titled “65 Reasons to Love Barbara Glanz.” (I could hardly think of five of them! 😉 It was even held together with butterfly ribbon.

My children had planned a special outing when I was in Portland for Mother’s Day with a chocolate papaya body wrap, a facial, a night out with just the girls, brunch at the Blue Hour restaurant followed by a manicure and pedicure. Oh, how I LOVED the pampering!

The gifts I received touched my heart in so many ways because all of them were thoughtful of ME and what I so love – beautiful (and some hilarious) cards, books of the heart, starfish and butterfly jewelry, angel things, and my most favorite from my little 7 and 9 year old grandchildren – a remote control FARTING bear! What other Grandmother do you know who got such a fun gift????

When I was complaining one day about hating to say that I was going to be 65, a dear friend chastised me by pointing out all the precious people in our lives and world who do not have that choice, and it quickly changed my attitude. My father died at 62, my mother-in-law at 64, and my precious husband at 68, so I am so VERY BLESSED to still be enjoying the gift of life God has given to me.

This past year and a half I have ridden an elephant, a camel, and a Harley. I have traveled to Antarctica, Argentina, Brazil, Egypt, Mexico, Thailand, India, Vietnam, and many, many places in the US. I have three wonderful children, a daughter and son-in- love, and four precious grandchildren. I have a deep sense of mission in my work, and I am blessed to have made wonderful friends in organizations all over the world. I have my health, a beautiful place to live on the beach, and I continue to learn something new each day.

I thank God that I have been given the gift of 65 years to share the JOY of friendship, love, sharing, growing, learning, laughing, and caring. Thank you for being a part of my life.

Love and blessings,
Barbara

For more inspirational stories and articles click here.

JUDY’S POEM TO ME
(NOTE: We have called each other “Buns I and Buns II ever since our college days… 😉

Buns..
A special friend.
To the end.
A lifelong bond, so very fond we are
Of each other.
I never had a sister
Or a close-by mother,
But I have you.
Life glue.
We stick together,
Forever…
Whatever comes our way.
Little gifts in the mail.
We never fail
To support the other.
Honesty is a policy
Between us.
You make me feel so funny
When I hear your sunny
Giggles and laugh.
My burdens seem lighter;
Joys are brighter..
You’re such a fighter.
You always lessen my fears..
Help dry up my tears.
I admire your persistence.
Your courage and resistance
To negatives.
Your incredible faith
Has helped to make
Mine stronger and
Long for more time with you.
You ‘CARE,’ like your ‘Packages’ for
Work and Home.
You are ‘Loyal’ and keep your
Friends ‘Returning.’
You are ‘Creative,’ a great ‘Communicator.’
You always ‘Balance’ your ‘Act.’
And you share great depth and compassion
When we ask ‘What Can I Do?’
And..
We would all choose to stand in
Your line,
Like people do in “Johnny’s.”

Love, Buns I 5/08
(Judy Ballard Ellwsworth)

What would you say if you were given the opportunity to give a ‘last lecture’ on life? What would you say if this opportunity came along after you were diagnosed with a terminal illness?

If you are Randy Pausch, what you say will become an inspiration to people all over the world. The video of your lecture will circulate all over the internet, become a major YouTube hit, and you will write a book based on your final ‘official’ lecture at Carnegie Mellon University.

Randy Pausch, a professor of computer science at Carnegie Mellon, was diagnosed in 2006 with Pancreatic cancer. His inspiring lecture and book, appropriately titled The Last Lecture, have given this amazing professor, father and husband a lasting and poignant platform for saying goodbye to his family and friends and a final, lasting gift to his small children who will have little memory of the father they will soon lose. His focus on achieving childhood dreams allows no time for pity and sorrow. Life is too short.

By the end of 2007, Pausch was given the final, grim piece of news regarding his diagnosis. It had spread, beyond hope of recovery, and palliative care was his last option. He was told he had 3 to 6 months of good health left. As of today, Randy Pausch continues to update his many friends, family members, and those he has touched with his story on his website, www.randypausch.com. Through links on these pages, you can watch the full-length YouTube video that launched his story, read excerpts from The Last Lecture, and follow his ‘scorecard of health’ (entitled “Today’s box score”) which may not seem the most tasteful but, if you know his story and you can appreciate his amazing sense of humor and lasting courage, represents the portrayal of a dying man who still has plenty of life left in him and never misses the chance to use a sports metaphor!

While ‘living on borrowed time,’ Randy Pausch serves as an inspiration to those who are suffering, are grieving for someone who has passed away or is facing a terminal illness, or for anyone who needs a little reminder of how precious life truly is. Pausch’s appreciation for life and his ability to continuously find joy in the world around him are uplifting.

For more inspiring stories about appreciation, read The Simple Truths of Appreciation.
To find out how to help someone who is grieving, read What Can I Do? Ideas to Help Those Who Have Experienced Loss. Both books, by Barbara Glanz, are available at books.php3

I am just returning from a three day reunion in San Antonio, Texas, with six of my high school girl friends. We all graduated from Harlan High School in Harlan, Iowa, in 1961, and today live all over the US. One of us is from Pennsylvania, one from Arizona, one from Indiana, two from Texas, one still in Iowa, and of course, I am now from Florida.

We have all gone on to do many different things with our lives — one of us works in insurance, one in banking, one is a retired teacher, one worked with her husband in their trucking company, one is a retired medical technician, one worked in retail, and I am a speaker and author. Of all of us, only three are still working. Two of our husbands have died, one is divorced, and the other four are all with the same husband they married soon after high school.

What is amazing is that even after all these years and all the changes in our lives, we can still come together and share the joys and sorrows of our lives with no thought of competition or judgment. The very best part of our reunion, however, is sharing old memories. We laughed and laughed and all became young girls again!

Read More…

Hi, I am Tara O’Gorman, Barbara’s assistant.  Barbara asked if I would be interested in posting my own thoughts on her website blog, and I happily jumped at the opportunity.  Look for my weekly blog, posting interesting articles, thoughts, and other bits related to customer service, inspiration, and motivation.

This week’s post was a ‘no brainer’ for me after I first learned of the story.  I am a HUGE sports fan, and the combination of sportsmanship, inspiration, and service to others fits the theme of this blog so well.  I hope you enjoy the following article and video post about a group of college softball players who rose above the sole desire to win and, with an amazing act of selflessness, have touched all who have heard their story.

——————— 
From the Statesman Journal in Salem, Oregon:

“Injured Western Oregon player helped around bases after hitting homer”

MATT MONAGHAN
Statesman Journal

April 30, 2008

Last weekend’s softball series between Western Oregon and Central
Washington was supposed to be a battle between two teams trying to
win a conference championship.

Read More…

Mother’s Day Special–One copy of “CARE Packages for the Home– Dozens of Little Things You Can Do to Regenerate Spirit at Work”, $12.00 plus $6.00 shipping (retail $16.95); Each additional copy $10.00 plus $2.00 shipping.

GIVE SOMEONE YOU LOVE A GIFT THAT WILL LAST A LIFETIME!

Celebrate Mother’s Day! Give your Mother, Sister, Grandmother, Aunt, Teacher, Friend or Neighbor an inspirational and loving book that she will enjoy and cherish for years to come.

Mother’s Day is a time to recognize not only our mothers but all those special women who have made a difference in our lives. What better way to celebrate them than with a book of ideas that will help them create even more caring and joy in their homes, neighborhoods, and communities?

Barbara Glanz has recently revised this classic book to help families celebrate one another and create new traditions:

“In this book Barbara offers countless ways to help families forge more caring, creative and joyful places to live. Through ideas and stories from real-life families, schools, and neighborhoods, Glanz encourages readers to take action by adapting the ideas to their own families. Whether your family is a traditional family, a single-parent family, a blended family, an extended family, or a retired family, this book contains special ideas just for you!”

This book also makes a precious and lasting wedding, shower, or baby gift as new families are formed. And it is a perfect gift to send to your employees’ homes as a “thank you” to their families.

Jack Canfield, coauthor of the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” books, says, “This is a wonderful resource for any family that wants to actively pursue creating more loving and caring in their home. I highly recommend it.”

ORDER YOUR COPIES AT THE SPECIAL PRICE TODAY THROUGH MAY 31!

Mother’s Day Special: One copy of “CARE Packages for the Home — Dozens of Little Things You Can Do to Regenerate Spirit Where You Live,” $12.00 plus $6.00 shipping (retail $16.95); Each additional copy $10.00 plus $2.00 shipping.

To order this new book, go to www.barbaraglanz.com/products/books.php3 or call us at 941-312-9169.

Read More…

I was interviewed this week for “HR Wire” magazine about what to do to help employees through a downsizing. At the end of the interview, the writer told me that I was the only person she had interviewed who had talked about the importance of dealing with people’s FEELIINGS. She said that every other “expert” had simply talked about systems, processes, and the business aspects of returning to productivity.

I shared with her that several years ago Mike Stewart, a colleague and friend, and I developed a wonderful program called “FEELING your Way Through Change – Understanding and Managing Transitions in Life and Work” to deal with this very issue, and it has been highly successful in helping individuals and organizations work through many different kinds of changes in a much more healthy way, accounting for both the business and the human sides of change. (This program can be a keynote, half day or full day program.)

Read More…